CHAOS

I have many conflicting emotions as I write this. My heart is filled with love for friends that are all over the eastern part of the US. I spent 10 weeks at Discipleship Focus (DFo) immersed in a community of college-aged people. We worked together, lived together, and played together (cheesy) as we all went through an in-depth study about the truths of God. I am saddened that we are all over the country now and not together in Pigeon Forge. I am also sad that I will not be going back to JMU this year and that I am not living in the Graffiti House. After DFo, a few friends and I travelled around Tennessee to visit new cities and friends. We visited college houses and it hit me that I won't be in a college house this coming year. It is weird that I will still be doing college things, but I won't be in Harrisonburg. I am fearful and overwhelmed as I face the reality that student teaching begins in 10 days and I have yet to enroll thanks to my status as a non-degree seeking student. My car ride home from Pigeon Forge last night lasted 12 hours, even though Kevin and I tried our hardest to shave minutes off of our ETA. Our quick pit stop in Newport News lasted 2 hours since my tired popped which actually ended up being a broken wheel (woo). This means an expensive repair, which I have no way of paying for and which I hate making my mom pay for. 

Now comes the hope. I have grown! These events normally bog me down, especially at home where following the Lord can be hard for me to do. All this morning, When I start stressing out and preparing for a pity party, I am reminded that God is in control and I have searched for the blessings among my situations. In addition to the cost of repairing my vehicle, which is only mine for a few more days, I had a burden of school costs. Not being able to enroll yet, I had not heard about any financial aid. So earlier today I was (almost) stressing about that other added cost. I got a scholarship that covers a little over half of my tuition for this semester a few weeks ago, but I have no where near the $2000 extra I need. I checked ecampus, as I did a few times this summer, and under Financial Aid I have my scholarship and a grant for 2750! Where it came from I have no idea and when I was supposed to accept it I have no idea, but it is accepted and it is for the 2011-2012 school year. SO great. I had a few tears in my eyes as I also received another congratulatory letter today from the College of Education for my scholarship. It must have been God's way of reminding me that he provides for those who believe in Him. The cost to repair my car is a bit large, but mom was okay with it and looked at the positives of it. SO thankful she has a glass half full mentality.

This weekend we celebrate Cath turning 50 and I cannot wait. She has a very eventful weekend ahead of her and all I can hope for is that she feels loved. I am back home, so look forward to more blog processing and updates on life.